The life of the person on this site is currently under construction. Please look for further updates in later on this Summer.

Where Are You?

Where did you go? You were right here. We were talking. (Well, you were actually at your computer, and we weren't exactly talking, but it felt like we were.) Then suddenly - you vanished! I couldn't find you anywhere. What will I do without you?

Check it out!

I walk past this lady's lawn every day and I always admire it and today she was out watering her garden-lawn so now we are very good friends. Her name is Lou Garrett and she grew up in Elk Point. She didn't want her picture taken, but she is a sweet white-haired Grandma, maybe 80. I think gardening keeps her healthy. If you get to meet her you'll see what I mean, she is so full of inner vitality Yup! This is her front lawn! What do you think guys? Should I do it? Lou told me everything you see here are annuals, so she doesn't have to plant them every year. She told me she takes care of them during the winter by putting a thick blanket of leaves from the city. She only has to do that when there hasn't been much snow covering them. She said the recent cold weather wasn't good for them, because even back when you couldn't see anything green happening, they were still growing underground.
That's like us. People often can't see how we are growing. Our ideas about life and ourselves change and still it takes time before the fruits of those inner changes blossom and later become fruit. That's why we need to be told "nourish the tree as it beginneth to grow," (and because the beginning of growing isn't visible) "by your faith with great diligence and with patience, looking forward to the fruit thereof ... And because of your diligence, and your faith and your patience...in nourishing it, that it may take root in you," ( the root underground, not visible but real and vital to the health of the whole tree) " behold by and by ye shall pluck the fruit thereof which is sweet above all that is sweet, and which is white above all that is white, yea and pure above all that is pure; and ye shall feast upon this fruit even until ye are filled, that ye hunger not, neither shall ye thirst.
"Then my brethren, ye shall reap the rewards of your faith, and your diligence, and patience, and long-suffering, waiting for the tree to bring forth fruit unto you." (Alma 32: 41-43 -of course you knew that)
Yeah, that's how we need to be with each other and ourselves. Long suffering and patient, believing that our best is growing within us and taking root and the fruit is forthcoming. Count on it.

My Gift

As in, the gift that I get. Just for coming to the planet. Yams, carrots, brocccolli, cauliflower, beets, potatoes, onions, chicken, spices. And a loving friend to cook it for me! When I moved here my roommate Sophia came up to me every night and hesitatingly asked, "Would it be all right with you if I cooked you dinner." Well, I don't like to mooch, but I was hungry, and she looked like she really wanted me to eat with her. Last week I just gave her money for groceries to ease my conscience. She's so cute! Last night she was all, "Have you eaten? ...No? Can I make you supper? I'll be really fast!" And she made this in no time at all. And I've decided the vegetarian meal replacement powder I mix in with my whey protein shake does not come close to this for healthiness or tasting good. By the ingredients - Brown Rice, Flax, Chlorella, Sunflower Oil, Stevia, Licorice, Wild Blueberry, Grape, Raspberry, Cranberry, Cherry, Wild Bilberry, Strawberry, Rooibos, and a full spectrum of digestive enzymes plus a vitamin and mineral blend - one would assume it would have real food licked. But it makes me shudder every time I gulp it down. My new plan it to use absorb it through my skin. First I will go to Marvel, probably next week and get a body wrap treatment. Then I will duplicate it at home and use my healthy vegetarian powder as the goo. I'm back and forth about whether to mix it with water, olive oil, or mud. Sometimes I think I should use them all but then I worry that their conflicting jobs will nullify each other. You know, - the mud drawing out toxins, the olive oil being absorbed - will they know how to get around each other okay? That's why I need to go to Marvel first and learn. I know you are remembering honey right now. Well, ...maybe I should put a little honey in. It does have good bacteria and enzymes aren't bacteria. Am I right? Are enzymes the same as bacteria and no one told me? Well, if anyone has advice, freely dispense it. I'm not trying this till next week.

Dream Big

While I was in Cardston I got to go to a community musical. This one was Tom Sawyer -very fun, and on the program was a list of all the musicals that had happened in previous years. And way back in the list were two musicals that I remember going to when I was a little girl living in Cardston. Showboat and Man of La Mancha. I remember how they moved me. I particularly carried away with me the memory of the song that the Man of La Mancha sings. I was thinking about it today and thinking how cool it would be to jazz it up. Like if this guy were to sing it to us - and from his heart, how cool that would sound. Do you know the song? To dream the impossible dream - to fight the unbeatable foe - To bear with unbearable sorrow - to run where the brave dare not go - to right the unrightable wrong - to love pure and chaste from afar - To try when your arms are too weary - to reach the unreachable star - This is my quest to follow that star no matter how hopeless -No matter how far - to fight for the right without question or pause -To be willing to march into hell for a heavenly cause - And I know if I'll only be true to this glorious quest -That my heart will lie peaceful and calm when I'm laid to my rest - And the world will be better for this that one man scorned and covered with scars - Still strove with his last ounce of courage to reach the unreachable star.

I am a dreamer. Onto another topic I watched Horton Hears a Who. I wish I had every line memorized from that movie. The only other movie I did that with was the Princess Bride. I really think this movie deserves to be one of the greats, written on our hearts. "In my world everyone is a pony who eats rainbows and poops butterflies" ....

"Look at what he's got the children doing! Their using their imaginations!"

If you haven't see it I hope that won't ruin the movie for you. If you have seen it, I really identify with Horton. Its a side of me I might show you if I sense you would also believe in things that you can't touch or see but are real and important and worth giving your life to serve and protect - even if no one else believes you - even if you have to live being ridiculed for it. Hmm, ... I guess Horton and The Man of La Mancha aren't really much different from each other after all!

This Morning's News

I'm not bragging - I'm sharing the loveliness with you. Even though you are not here with me to enjoy this, you can almost pretend, from looking at the picture that you are, I think. I wish you were. Edmonton is so beautiful and green. It looks like I'm going to be here for two more four month sections of time. I think I'll be able to do that. I'll just move rooms with my roommates every time I need to pack up and go. Today I'm going to Marvel College to get my acceptance letter for school in September so I can show it to the people who want to pay for school. I mean, I don't and they do so why not let them? I'm all about win-win.

It's raining here this morning. Aren't those plants pretty? I've never seen any real ones like them before now.

There aren't words for how much I love these lilies. They are what I want to be when I grow up. So peaceful and giving to others - the way their petals uncurl towards us showing us their loveliness. Without expecting anything in return. Just happy knowing they've made the world a little better. And not needing to rush around. You smile, but some flowers do work very hard to be everywhere at once - like dandelions. I hope that taking this spa therapy course will help me become more like the calm still lily.

The Cozy Farm Life

This is The Mother Cat. This has been her favorite napping place since she was a kitten.

This is Mom. This has been her favorite place to be since I was a kitten. I mean child. (Those two words are used interchangeably here.) My Mom calls her children kittens. Even though there isn't one of them under 18.It may have something to do with the fact that we sleep like kittens. Often, sporadically and in a heap. At least when we come home. We go off into the world for months or weeks at a time and work, got to school, have committed relationships and roommates,even our own pets and furniture. But in the case of the girls - we come back to the farm and rest, get reorientated and take off in a different direction throughout the year. The boys tend to not to. Jon has his own family, but even before that, he never did come home and sit around sewing new outfits and making fudge and having parties at the parents in between school. He mostly went snowboarding with his buddies or worked and earn big money wherever he was at. Charles .... uh, is wild. He lives in the wild for most of the year guiding wannabe hunters up north. He has a big truck now, instead of the little car he used to drive. He also told me last week that he is going to buy a house this fall, instead of that car he used to live in. I'm told the cousins let him stay with them if he chooses. Yes well, I'll chat with ya'all later!

I Love Birds and Yellow Fluffy Insects

Look what I found! Aaah. So cute - right? A little home.


I followed this busy guy around for a while. He didn't even care. It didn't seem to bother him that I was sitting right next to him or that I flashed the camera in his face.

Is It Getting Tough?

I love this old adage. I think this only applies to girls though. I don't know what guys do when the going gets tough - there really should be some kind of proverb for them. Some kind of masculine finish that gets them motivated when they are discouraged. Well, if someone comes up with something ... apparently guys are reading this, Heidi and Sharon. What good advice do we have for them?

Wow!

This made me scream. It was like a bomb going off! One minute there was a vase with water and a rose and some baubles in it on the middle of the table and then POW! - the vase exploded and everything flew out in every direction. Who ever heard of an exploding vase! And I was the one who had just filled it and put in on the table less than an hour earlier. I could have been killed!

It reminds me of something Gonzo said in Muppet Treasure Island, how he wanted to go to Zanzibar to see the Zanzibarbarian women and their Exploding Wigs of Death! I used to chuckle at that - not any more guys. Not any more.

Hello!

I suppose you want to know how I do it. The secret is chocolate. Its full of smile inducing chemicals (as everyone knows) as well as flavinoids and anti-oxidants which keep the skin clear and young looking. It also tastes good! Sometimes I add things to my chocolate like a handful of almonds or some oatmeal. The caffeine in it also helps me feel alert in the morning and stay up late at night so I don't miss out on anything! Maybe you can see that I am looking a little sleep deprived - don't worry, I've already had my morning chocolate so it shouldn't be a problem. Other health foods I can recommend to you are corn dogs and the hot yummy cheese they give you at 7-11. As my Mom often quotes to us, "The world is so full of a number of things - I'm sure we should all be as happy as kings!"

And we are happy! This is Liza and I getting ready for the dance. She is just entering the young adult world and on the way to the dance I tried talking her into coming up and living with me when she graduates from High School. Being careful not to come across as offensive, she let me know she was actually wanted to become a responsible member of society, but thanked me anyway. I assured her that the only way I survive is because I have around me a plethora of responsible people, and that I was sure she would identify with them and even want to emulate them. So we struck a deal that she should at least come to Edmonton for a couple of days and see how she felt. And then, she could either stay on or not. She is actually quite in demand. Almost all the sisters are begging for her to come stay with them. Even some of the Aunts and cousins. And who wouldn't, look at her - she is even sweeter and kinder and more full of prudence and wisdom than you can see from the picture. We'll see what she chooses. Oh! I hope she picks me!

Beasts

Infinite Beasts

From time to time I watch you closely, with new eyes,
appreciating how much of you I haven't seen

and I'm no longer sure whether it's what I know of you
that attracts me, or what I might find.

When we met, I thought knowledge had limits, that in love
we were finite beasts who shared known boundaries

but watching you touch objects for which I have no desire
I see a measure of longing in your eyes

that forces me to say, I don't know you yet. That forces me
to say, there are places in you I may not wish to know.

In love we are beasts of infinity, crude in our longing
for things that may carry us apart. It's more than biology

or romance, more than drawing thorns from feet
with gentled fangs, more than all we have been told;

it's finding a reason to come together
without killing the wildness we each carry

like a gift we haven't decided to share
and hold inside ourselves with only the edges showing.

~Rhona McAdam

This is What Happened

Yesturday our Tom Cat's rival tried to assume ownership of the porch and leadership of the cats. He was bigger and fluffier than our Tom but none of the cats would let him take over. In this particular cat domain the Alpha Male loved and washed and played with the kittens ever since they can remember. It is not just survival of the fittest. Its like the old saying "Anyone can be a Father, but it takes someone special to be a Daddy." Apparently their Daddy was beaten by this other cat and he had come to claim the wife and kids, drive off the sons and make more kittens. Which is how life in cat world operates. Except here. Here they are a loyal family and they drove away the new guy and welcomed their daddy back even if he wasn't the biggest and the fluffiest. He was theirs and they loved him. I went out to take a picture of the family all piled on top of each other sleeping in the cat carrier, but they all jumped up when I opened the door and the Mom jumped into my lap and the Dad and kids watched me from a distance - in a cat kind of way. To the untrained eye it is difficult to detect being watched from being ignored. Sunday the cats were watching me. I pretended not to notice until they looked straight at me. Then I looked up quickly and made eye contact. That caused them to turn their head and yawn in an exaggerated way. Cats are very good spies. They use everyday nonverbal signals to confuse and mislead you. They are one of my favorite animals.

You and Lucy

She Dwelt Among the Untrodden Ways

She dwelt among the untrodden ways Beside the springs of Dove,

A Maid whom there were none to praise And very few to love:

A violet by a mossy stone

Half hidden from the eye! --Fair as a star, when only one Is shining in the sky. She lived unknown, and few could know when Lucy ceased to be; But she is in her grave, and, oh, The difference to me! - William Wordsworth

What a lovely tragic poem. The subject of death aside, I like how it captures the truth of how each person has rich value, just because we exist. Or did exist.

I hope you know the difference you make.